When I cited a recent article on rediscovering He-Man, I assumed that the text of the He-Man Opening Monologue would be all over the Net, but it was surprisingly hard to find. Even the ludicrously complete Wikipedia entry didn’t have it:
I am Adam, prince of Eternia and defender of the secrets of Castle Grayskull.This is Cringer, my fearless friend.
Fabulous secret powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic sword and said, “By the power of Grayskull! I have the power!”
Cringer became the mighty Battle Cat, and I became He-Man, the most powerful man in the universe!
Only three others share this secret — our friends, the Sorceress, Man-at-Arms, and Orko. Together we defend Castle Greyskull from the evil forces of Skeletor.
I must assume we are all aware that there is a critical theory/feminist critique of the implicit masculinist sexual metaphor at work here.
It’s a good example for them to have chosen — once the postmodern mindset gets into one’s head it’s actually almost impossible not to see material like this in those terms, let alone let it be played straight the way it was for kids in more innocent days. What a world.
No clue what you are referring to, Graham. Honestly, I’m not even sure I understand what you’ve written. Lol. What I do see is a monologue to the greatest cartoon ever made of which I watched every single day of my childhood, that made me more confident and also more thoughtful of others. He-man taught me how to be strong, but to also understand that we are all special and we should treat each other as such. No one knows anything about another person besides what we are allowed to see, so we should always take in to account that we are never seeing the full picture, and so trust and grace go a long way when dealing with others. Whatever you see in this monologue or the cartoon, I don’t know — but that’s what it was for me.
It wasn’t one of my favourites back then, but I was aware of it and also took it as it was intended, without subtext.
My earlier comment was intended to be tongue in cheek. And to observe that once one encounters certain strands of progressive doublespeak, one cannot quite go home again.
In this case, there are entire realms of the internet and probably campus discussion in which that bit about the magic sword is a puberty/genitalia metaphor for male power. I am not kidding. And once you encounter this way of viewing the world, hold it in contempt though you might, it is always there in the back of one’s head.
In the context of this discussion, it’s worth linking this old internet chestnut, which shows a similar mythopoetic sensibility on He-Man.
http://flyingmoose.org/heman/heman.htm
The 2-part re-launch script is actually surprisingly good! But hey, have people seen the She-Ra reboot on Netflix? Good grief, it’s actually watchable!
Isegoria should do a piece of the re-launching and re-imagining of 80′s cartoons. I think it shows an interesting trajectory of Generation X kids.
I haven’t watched Netflix’s The Power of Grayskull, but The Toys that Made Us was fascinating — every episode, honestly, even though I owned none of the toys under discussion (except Legos). Every episode was an excellent business story.
I haven’t watched the re-imagined She-Ra, but it certainly looks agenda driven.