In France, the gangs don’t live in the inner city; they live in the suburbs. And they don’t have attack dogs; they have attack monkeys:
Imported illegally through Spain from Gibraltar, Morocco or Algeria, the Barbary apes are known for their powerful limbs, sharp teeth and short tempers. Veterinary experts say they can be turned into frightening and effective weapons.
“They live naturally on rocks or in a desert environment,” said Marie-Claude Bomsel of the natural history museum in Paris. “Removed from their natural habitat, they can become highly aggressive. They bite, and their favoured method of attack is to hurl themselves at people’s heads.”
Police believe as many as 500 Barbary apes may have been smuggled into France in the past two years. Bought for about £30 each by youngsters visiting their families in north Africa, they change hands on the council estates [housing projects] around Paris for as much as £300.
These so-called Barbary apes are more correctly known as Barbary macaques — with their stubby tails they qualify as true monkeys, not apes. (Also, that’s not a recent news story, but something reminded me of it; I can’t remember what.)
Monkeys are a lot less loyal and reliable than dogs. Meaning this fad has probably fizzled out by now because many of the suburban muzzies and blacks sustained serious injuries from monkey attacks.
So this is shaping up to be a full blown LOTR scenario. What other exotic animals will be on the orc side in europe’s coming civil wars?
I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for Easterlings with oliphaunts to besiege Paris.
Just be careful when eating dates from an open dish.
Personally, I would love to see Easterlings and Oliphaunts besiege Paris. And the Corsairs of Umbar ravaging the south of France.